Randomly I have these little flashes of light in my head where an idea runs through and I decide I want to trap it there instead of letting is scurry onward. Such just happened to me... I was writing an email to one of my oldest, dearest friends, Macie and writing a thank you note to a cousin I respect almost as much as anyone, Dusty, when I thought I would really like to document the meanings and the feelings that I associate with these people that I love and respect and cherish so dearly. Plus I have spent brief periods in my life with such amazing people, only to have us each move on to another point in our lives with only fleeting glimpses of our relationship that I wish I would have documented a little better. I was going to title it "Hannah's Hotshot" or "Hannah's Heroes"... etc. etc. However I thought it took something away from the person I am trying to .... ohh who am I kidding??? Let me stop trying to act like I am not going to name it "Hannah's Hotshot" anyway.
Hannah's Hotshot
Name: Bob Waninski
Age: Age is fleeting, but beauty is forever
Relationship: I met Bob through my job with SGT on the Salem project. A native Chicagoan, he was our Salem site engineer and one of the few mechanical engineers on the project.
First Impressions: I had never met Bob, but we had weekly conference calls with our insulation vendor whom he cursed out on one occasion - I thought, "Wow, I better not mess with this Polish guy."
Memories:
- he took us to Coyote Joe's in Chicago out of all places
- he was more excited about the polka music he finally coerced the DJ into playing at our Christmas Party than he was about anything else I had witnessed and proceeded to polka his little heart out
- gave me a polish shot glass at the end of the outage
- freaked out everytime I got warm and fuzzy or emotional
- referred to his wife (whom he loved so dearly and displayed it through his stories) as "da wife"
- so beautifully proud of his daughter
- his daisy dukes he wore for dress out clothes when going into containment
- making fun of Spout and arguing with Cabbage
- provided me with an application for Billy to become my boyfriend when we started dating (see below)
Reason he is a Hotshot: He always refered to himself as the eye candy in his relationship with his wife and in the office... but he couldn't hear a thing... which often provided comic relief in meetings and conversations with the customer.
Bob is someone I doubt I will have the opportunity to work with or possibly even see again, but I hope to always keep in contact with him, and I know I will never forget him.
Application for Billy (whom he referred to as Romeo):
Hannah,
We at SGT have an obligation to mentor our young, impressionable engineers as if they were our son or daughter.
That being the case, please have Romeo fill out the attached and return to me immediately. Gary, Brent and I will review and advise you in a few weeks or so of our decision as to whether this relationship shall continue or not.
Bob
Application for Permission to Date Hannah
APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE HANNAH NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage,and current medical report from your doctor.
NAME_____________________________________
DATE OF BIRTH_____________
HEIGHT___________
WEIGHT____________
IQ__________
GPA_____________
SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________
DRIVERS LICENSE #________________
BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES __________________________
HOME ADDRESS_______________________
CITY/STATE___________
ZIP______
Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain: ______________________________________________________________
Number of years they have been married ______________________________
If less than your age, explain _______________________________
ACCESSORIES SECTION:
A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No
B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No
C. A waterbed? __Yes __No
D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No
E. A tattoo? __Yes __No
F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring? __Yes __No
(IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATIONAND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)
ESSAY SECTION:
In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you? ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________
In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you? ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________
In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you? ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________
REFERENCES SECTION:
Church you attend ___________________________________________________
How often you attend ________________________________________________
When would be the best time to interview your:
father? _____________
mother? _____________
pastor? _____________
SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:
Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answersare confidential.
A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be: ______________________________________________________________
B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my: ______________________________________________________________
C: A woman's place is in the: ______________________________________________________________
D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is: ______________________________________________________________
E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________ ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________
F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is: ______________________________________________________________
G. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________
I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TOTHE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT,NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESEWATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)
_______________________________
Mother's Signature
________________________________
Father's Signature
_______________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi
________________________________
State Representative/Congressman
________________________________
Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases. (you might watch your back)
